‘Balls of Fury’ Movie Review (2007)

It would be wrong to say Balls of Fury is an affront to humanity, because it’s not famine or war, but it would also be wrong to say it’s worth seeing. It’s not, on any level, but instead of taking the easier route of simply ridiculing it I’m going to try and learn us up today, examining the precise reason it is so blatantly unfunny. Along the way maybe we’ll all learn something — now that’s a big bonus for a movie review.

The paper thin plot, shown in every clip and trailer, is a “recapturing the ping pong glory days to compete in a sinister villain’s evil tournament” style of story. You have seen this before, this quest for vengeance and justice wrapped around a comic plotline. It’s worked in films such as Dodgeball, Talladega Nights and Happy Gilmore while it’s failed miserably in movies like The Waterboy and The Longest Yard (the remake). But why do some sports comedies fail while others thrive?

I think it comes down to where the comedy is coming from. In the case of Balls of Fury the thought seems to be that Ping Pong is inherently funny. Furthermore, if Ping Pong is funny, then fake Ping Pong must be downright hysterical. But neither of these things is true. Talladega Nights worked for me because it wasn’t the racing that was stupid, it was the drivers. Happy Gilmore worked because it was just a venue for Adam Sandler to act silly. Thus, when Balls of Fury tries to go after laughs with CGI Ping Pong is all feels very lame and tired.

The other major problem is Dan Fogler. This movie propped him up as the star and it suffers greatly for that error. I think people looked at Seth Rogen and thought “Hey, just throw a chubby guy in there” but clearly it’s not that simple. Fogler is not interesting, likeable, or funny in this role. He’s the opposite of those things. He’s boring, unlikable, and not funny. This is a problem, especially after the stupid Ping Pong stops and the camera goes to Fogler for the laugh and it’s just not there in any form. I suppose I could go on about how Chris Walken was pointless in this role, or mention that the story was every bad comedy you’ve ever seen, but I don’t think any of that really matters. Once your premise (Funny Pong!) and your star (Fogler) fully suck then you’re screwed no matter what else is going on with the flick.

And so this in not worth seeing unless you’re drunk. Even then a viewing could be problematic because the guys behind me were clearly drunk and they couldn’t even find reason to laugh much. I chuckled half a dozen times (or once every 15 minutes) though there were definitely people in the crowd who laughed more than me. I don’t think those people are representative of you though because you’ve managed to read 500 words while they all had the tiniest bit of drool coming out of their mouths. To wrap this up, are you blackout drunk or drooling? Balls of Fury be for you!

GRADE: D
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